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Posts Tagged ‘Self-Esteem’

What is Ghosting? (February 11, 2017)

02/11/2017 Leave a comment

Bobby Brown said it best, “Oh oh, girl. As long as I’ve been giving my love to you. You should be giving me your love too. But you just keep on actin’ just like a fool. You know it ain’t cool. uh, don’t be cruel.” If you are being Ghosted–always remember that you are worth more.

Over the last couple of months, I have embarked on my latest side project (Set for release by the end of August 2017) that involves a ton of research on a number of choice subjects.  One of those areas, is the phenomena of Ghosting.

What is Ghosting?

Ghosting is today’s popular term for disregarding or completely ignoring a person.  It is commonly associated with (but not limited to) the dating scene wherein–for whatever reason–one party no longer keeps in contact with the other party.

Maybe you’ve gone on a few dates–with a potential Mr. or Mrs. Right–and things seem to be picking up…then all of the sudden: WHAM!  No contact.  No reply.  Or worst yet, you can clearly see that the messages you have sent were marked read on your smart phone or Facebook Messenger.

I know it’s not cool but there really are a lot of people like that out there.

What are it’s effects?

Depending on the amount of physical, emotional, and psychological investment that the ghosted party has for the person they are attempting to have a relationship with–the results could be devastating as it could affect the ghosted party’s self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-worth.

What can the ghosted party do?

Although it is never easy detaching yourself from someone whom you have invested in, it is best to keep some of these pointers in mind:

  1. You cannot have a relationship for two people.
  2. Marshall your emotional resources elsewhere.  Make investments in people who are willing to make an equal commitment to you.
  3. Make time for yourself.  If you can’t have a relationship with yourself, how then can you have a relationship with other people?

To learn more about Ghosting, check out this in-depth article by Psychology Today’s Dr. Jennice Vilhauer or you can send your questions over to my Facebook page.

Addendum:

Today is the feast of Our Lady of Lourdes.  Keep her in your prayers today.

Finding that need to exercise

08/12/2013 Leave a comment

As I was preparing for my circuit training class one afternoon, a fellow trainee came up to me and asked, “How do I motive myself to exercise?”  I thought about it for a moment and replied, “Well, getting yourself to the gym would be a good start.  Once you’re here and see all of us preparing—you’ll be raring to join us.”

Although said in a lighthearted manner, my classmate (if you will) got my point: Desiring exercise starts with putting oneself in an environment that promotes exercise.  This is followed by the need to have an intrinsic and realistic exercising goal that is not time bound.  To put it another way, your health/exercise goals should be your own and you shouldn’t forget to have fun while on your way to achieving them.

Exercise goals are long-term goals.  After all, very few of us can be like Elysium actor Matt Damon and spend four hours a day in the gym and be disciplined in what we eat—given the enormity of healthy food choices that we have available to us.  If you know what I mean…

Here are a few tips to get you started:

  1. Select an exercise activity that you find interesting and do some research – What is it? Is there a gym near you that offers it?  What are their rates?
  2. Like Goldilocks, try and try until you find the perfect fit – Don’t be discouraged if you are not too thrilled with your first exercise choice.  Just think that you have yet to discover the new one.
  3. Consult your doctor before engaging in any physical activity – Best to get the necessary clearances for your peace of mind.
  4. Start out the right way – Consult with a trainer or instructor for your first few sessions so that you’ll be more informed on the proper execution of your chosen exercise.
  5. Don’t forget to have fun and ‘rest days.’ – Getting fit and feeling better can be an enriching experience so always be mindful of the journey and not the destination.  Also know when to take a day off and rest as too much exercise may lead to unanticipated injuries.

Enjoy your exercise journey guys!

Contact information:

If you would like to set an appointment, you can reach Dr. Villasor at the Makati Medical Center trunk line number: 888-8999 (Local 2357) or through their direct line: 844-2941.

What are Millennials?

05/22/2013 Leave a comment
Time Magazine's May 20, 2013 issue

Time Magazine’s May 20, 2013 issue

According to TIME Magazine’s Joel Stein, Millennials or Generation Y are people born between 1980-2000.  They are “fame-obsessed” and compared to the generation that is now 65 or older, “the incidences of narcissistic personality disorder are three times as high.”  Coined by Strauss and Howe, Millennials were described as having been empowered by the information revolution—to the point that their self-esteem and self-worth have reached record levels compared to past generations.

Simply put, Stein’s piece paints a picture of a young entitled adolescent who may have already defined who they are at the tender age of 14.  Today, their self-worth is in such a fragile state and can change in an instant based on how many ‘likes or dislikes’ they get on their social media posts.  As for the millennial generation workforce, they are no longer shackled by the modesty or unspoken etiquette of their predecessors as they are now willing to question their CEO about the projects that they are assigned to and why they must do them.

Despite the seemingly brimming overconfidence of the millennial generation, Stein also points out that the transition of this population out of their parent’s home has also been “prolonged” and “stunted.”  A failure-to-launch of sorts.

For more, pick up TIME Magazine’s May 20, 2013 issue.

Out now in newsstands everywhere.

Addendum:

  • With the release of the May 27, 2013 Angelia Jolie cover issue of TIME Magazine, it has become a challenge for some people to procure the May 20 issue.  Good luck!

Sidebar Feature: “Age Is Not An Issue” in the May 2013 issue of Women’s Health Philippines

05/10/2013 Leave a comment
Age Is Not An Issue: Dr. Villasor's tips for upping your self-esteem at any age.  Photo credit: Ms. Regine Rafael

Age Is Not An Issue: Dr. Villasor’s tips for upping your self-esteem at any age. | Photo credit: Ms. Regine Rafael

Awhile back, I was interviewed by one of the editors of Women’s Health Philippines’ and my good friend Regine Rafael for a sidebar piece on the subject of self-esteem.  Highest marks Reg!

The sidebar (and more) can be found in the May 2013 issue of Women’s Health Philippines that is out now wherever magazines are sold.

Grab your copy today!